Woman's Life | Blog | Trying to conceive

"It's good to know that you're not alone."

Trying for a baby can put couples to the test. You should know that you are not alone. Hearing about other people's journeys can provide good support for yours. Every story is unique but with the same goal to start a family.

Content overview: 

1. In vitro fertilisation (IVF): Artificial fertilisation
2. An emotional roller coaster: When biological age is reached
3. Insemination "starting a pregnancy"
4. Planning sex by appointment
5. Start your family planning with a personal fertility test

 "Experience reports can be used to share helplessness and mental pain."

In addition to advice, talking with others can help you share your anguish. Perhaps as a couple, you have tried many ways to start a family. Planning is often stuck and doesn't even allow you to look in a different direction. No wonder, because baby happiness should be fulfilled spontaneously.

In vitro fertilisation (IVF): Artificial fertilisation

This was the case with Nadja and Sven *. They tried over several years and ended up in a fertility practice. When the first thoughts about family planning arose about eight years ago, Nadja stopped taking the pill. Both had regular sex. Nevertheless, the hoped-for pregnancy did not materialise. After about two years, they decided to visit their doctor. They underwent extensive testing from blood collection to hormone status measurement. The result was clear: Natural fertilisation was not possible.

An emotional roller coaster: When biological age is reached

Age played a major role for Anne*. Now 44 years old, she looks back on a turbulent time. Just as she was 30 years old when she felt her biological clock was ticking. Nevertheless, she wanted to start a family with her partner Alexander*.

"When the desire to have a baby determines the whole life, the relationship suffers."

No pressure, that was their motto. But the older Anne got, the more she wanted to start a family sooner rather than later. However, there was no spontaneous pregnancy and Alexander was already thinking about how life without a child would be. For Anne, these thoughts were not worth considering; instead, she made accusations that she had waited too long for the war on children. The result: Anne began to suffer emotionally, and the relationship became threatened.

Insemination "starting a pregnancy"

The couple used homologous insemination as their last attempt to become pregnant. Alexander's sperm was delivered via a soft tube directly to the oocyte in Annes' uterus (cf.familie.de, 2022). Unlike IVF, the chances of success of this artificial fertilisation are as low as 12%. The success rate depends on several factors, including the sperm quality.

After several attempts, the treatment was successful for Anne and Alexander. Today, both are proud parents of three children of different ages. The couple feel that insemination was the "push" they needed to start their family. The younger children were conceived naturally.

Planning sex by appointment

Fun or just exhausting: For Zoe and Jaron*, having sex according to the calendar was simply part of their family planning. They have always adjusted their sex life to meet Zoe's cycle without really understanding the best time for conception.

"I think I have my fertile days. Now we need to have sex."

The couple went through this plan for about two years. During this time, the relationship was put to the test. The couple became stressed and put under pressure. The sex became strenuous and the purpose was only to concieve. Which they didn't.

Zoe and Jaron decided to speak to a specialist. With advice on preparing for pregnancy, it became clear to them that they had been miscalculating their 'calendar' approach. They were reducing their chances of pregnancy by only calculating the days after ovulation and not the days before. All in all, sex shouldn't be a burden, but something beautiful shared by a couple. With this knowledge, Zoe became pregnant after 2 years. A brother was to follow for the little Julian, but it didn't work out. The couple also went on to foster another younger child.

Having sex twice a week can increase the chances of pregnancy without pressure and without adjusting to your cycle.